Specifically about meditation and ending stress and just being happy,
But what I found out applies to any struggle in any part of your life.
I have a fair idea about the meditation struggles, but helping people get EXACTLY what they need is something crucial, no?
The clearer I can be about what you need, the more useful my whole mission becomes.
In the asking, it’s obvious -
And its only obvious because I used to do this myself, a lot -
One of the biggest problems you have is your own judgements about yourself -
What you’re doing wrong, how you messed up again, let someone down, let yourself down.
Everyone wants to do good and not do bad.
Yet that distinction is not that helpful.
You do "bad" and then feel bad.
It’s not motivating, it’s easier to say “I’m useless” and give up trying.
You get into that cycle of stop / start / stop - “what’s the point?”
Everyone does stuff bad - everyone makes mistakes - sometimes constantly.
Given what you say you want -
WHATEVER that maybe -
Close your eyes more, eat better, move more, be more appreciative and considerate to your partner …
It helps to consider that some choices you make are simply “unskilled”
These choices aren’t giving you what you say you want -
If you are “unskilled” then you can definitely get more skilled, right?
It becomes a straight forward matter of practicing the right things.
Sometimes you have to ask an expert what these right things are.
(Expert: an intimidating word that simply means someone who has made all the mistakes - and learned from them - so you don’t have to)
But once you set in place a small plan to do things just a little bit better than yesterday …
A little bit better, and a little bit better -
(who cares if progress is “only” a tiny amount? Do it regularly and it adds up to something sweet!)
The result is you start to feel pretty darn good about yourself.
Because everyone feels best when they feel like they’re improving.
And so much better than good/bad, right/wrong, great/useless …
Removing right and wrong from the equation takes the pressure off, cuts the self-judgement and all that stuff.
So have a little think about reframing good/bad to skilled/unskilled -
“How can I do this better?”
Be careful how you define yourself -
And THAT will require being aware of how you think about yourself -
Which meditation is (partially) all about
So - if you have any questions about this, just ask -
I’d love to help.
Otherwise, go well!
If you’d like to get started on learning the best meditation techniques on the planet for becoming more aware?
Here’s a free guide that will get you up and running, super quick: