Regrets? Why not make a life so you don’t have any?

I saw an article the other day - it’s from a few years back, but it’s still really fresh.

The author interviewed elderly people on their death beds as to their regrets. Although its about people who are dying, it is really advice for people who are living.

Read it here:

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/01/top-five-regrets-of-the-dying

It’s a quick read, but something you might want to come back to again.

What did you think?

What I see is that the basis of all those regrets is not having balance, of not seeing what is important or making time for it until it is too late.

Not surprisingly, at least to me, the list contains many of the things that the people who come to the Ishayas’ Ascension meditation classes say they want from life.

You see, the people that I meet already know what is important to them, its just that they don’t prioritise it, or they don’t know how to prioritise it.

Actually I think everyone already knows these things, we just don’t do them.

Don’t wait until its too late.

You have to live a life so that when you look back on your deathbed you are filled with joy. That you don’t have a single “I really wish…”

You deserve the fullest of lives, in every sense.

Part of that comes from an attitude of finding the good in everything, of being present and not looking back.

The other part comes from making choices that are fulfilling, of finding a way to prioritise what is really important to you.

Meditation - to me the Bright Path Ishayas' Ascension is the simplest and most powerful of all meditations (I could be biased) - is the thing that enables both. It really does. It changes your approach to life, it helps you be the very best version of yourself.

Take the time every day to stop and go within. Close your eyes, rest. Discover what is there and how when you nourish it, it nourishes you.

It is the secret to living life versus Life.

Just practice - five, ten, fifteen minutes every day. Set a time, sit and don’t come up until the time is done.

You won’t regret it.

Any questions, send them to me, I would love to help.

The way to happiness, part 2.

Happiness. Why are so many people searching for happiness? Why doesn’t it come naturally to humans? Well, it does, actually. It is your true nature to be happy. It is very easy to be continually happy when you know how. Honestly, I speak the truth as one who has experienced unhappiness, stress, times of depression, anxiety, fear, all of those things that we don’t like. If I can find constant happiness, you can.

Life does not need to be ups and downs. That is not part of being human, it doesn’t have to be part of the deal. Suffering is not necessary, I promise.

If you like that idea, then you are in the right place. Just assuming it as a simple possibility is the first step to experiencing complete happiness and contentment, in every aspect of your life.

Last blog (see here if you missed it) I talked about how people expect that people, things, possessions, careers etc., etc., will make them happy. It’s not true. Make happiness an inside job, make it about not getting but being. Happiness is an attitude. First be happy, make it a foundation, then live your life.

The second reason why you aren’t continuously happy is this:

• You don’t make it a priority.

What is the most important thing to you? If you could give your loved ones one thing, anything at all, what would you give them?

Everyone I ask this question tell me some version of happiness. When it comes down to it, happiness is the most important thing to everyone. Everyone just wants to be happy.

But they don’t prioritise it.

It is well down the list of things to do.

Their lists are full of things to get and to achieve and to do, and then, right at the bottom, last on the list, when they have time to get to it, is to be happy.

Only because we believe after I do x, y or z, then I can be happy. Work first, finish things to do, and then be happy.

Nope, doesn’t work, you never get there.

If you are interested in being happy you have to be like an Olympic athlete of happiness.

Focus.

Make happiness the core of everything you do. Make it first and the middle and last. Train to be happy. Make everything about internal happiness.

Then, and only then, it comes and gets you. You realise that you are happy for no reason at all. Nothing can give you happiness, you just choose it. Nothing can take it away either. You prefer things go a certain way, but either way you are happy.

Practice. You need to prioritise and practice. Close your eyes every day and meditate. Keep it simple and joyful. If you want it simple, and joyful then learn the Bright Path Ishayas’ Ascension. Fastest path to happiness ever. I promise.

Be happy!

Common spiritual misconceptions #27 - Desires

Once upon a time, I tried living without desires. I’d been reading lots of Buddhist books and it seemed like they talked a lot about desirelessness and how that would make you happy. That’s the trouble with reading things without having someone to ask who actually knows. Having an experienced coach or a teacher makes the path super quick and smooth. There’s no guess work needed on your behalf. There’s no re-inventing the wheel.

But I digress…

So, I tried and I failed. And no wonder - without desire you don’t even get out of bed. You need desire to live, it is what gives your life sparkle. Without desire your life is grey, and a bit pointless.

The only trouble with desire comes when you hold tight to it, when you insist that your happiness depends on a certain desire being fulfilled in a certain way.

Desire is never the deal, its attachment that kicks you.

When you link your happiness with something you will always be disappointed. If you believe you can only be happy on sunny days you are setting yourself up for a lot of time unhappy.

But, if you are happy and content as you are and with what you have, and you enjoy the sun, then sunny days can only make you even happier.

Does that make sense?

Find contentment and gratitude with what you have and who you are. Make that the foundation of every moment. Be in love with your life, exactly as it is. And then go chase what you want to do. Live the life you wish to live. Be and do and have the things you want.

Just discern the difference between living from a foundation of happiness and achieving your desires. Unshackle happiness from desire, and then you can have both. Each and every moment will be a blast, and full, and alive.

Sounds like a good way to live to me.

Being bolder than your comfort zone

If you never did anything different, where would you be?If you never took a step into the unknown, what experience would you have? The same as ever, the same as everyone else.

Everything that you have done that is worth doing has required you to go beyond your comfort zone. Moving forward is rarely comfortable.

The mind hates progress for this reason.  And it’s why you can use that feeling as a gauge to indicate what is truly important to you.

If the idea of doing something makes you nervous or brings up doubt about whether you are up to the task then that is an excellent indicator of importance. Follow that idea, do that thing.

You see, the opposite of love is not hate but indifference.

If it doesn’t require you to overcome some resistance to get it, it has little value to you. The more resistance, the more value it has to you.

I don’t think you will ever get to a place where courage isn’t required. You just get better at ignoring the “I can’t’s”, the even more subtle “I’m not ready yet’s”, and of course the “it might all go wrong’s and then what’s?”

Being bolder is a skill that you can practice. It starts with awareness of your mind’s limitations and setting your attention beyond these complaints.

What do you want to do? Expect resistance and jump anyway.

The first step before flying is to leap.