How happiness is like exercise

Did you know...? Thinking too much, anxiety, worry, anger, fear, stress, actually negativity in general… all of these things are just habits.

They are something we’ve learned to do in response to things that we don’t like. The more you react in a certain way, the stronger that “way” gets and so the easier it is to respond like that.

It becomes a habit, a reaction.

It’s a bit of a bottomless cycle, a slippery slope.

But the good news is that it is just a habit. You can create another habit.

The even better news is that you don’t need to work out or overly analyse why you get stressed, or anxious, or not respond to life in the way that you want.

A habit is simply a strong pathway in the brain.

Want a new habit? Make another pathway. Do something else that takes you in another direction.

A little known key to life is what you put your attention on, grows.

The more you do it, the more the new habit becomes stronger and more “slippery” for your attention, the old one less so. You become incapable of behaving like you used to, simply because all your attention is on the new way of being.

Happiness is way more attractive to the mind. If you give it a chance it will become your default.

Good news indeed. I believe it was Aristotle who said:

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act, but a habit.”

In this way, happiness is a lot like going to the gym  - that’s why I say the source of happiness and all good things in life as occurring when you are mentally fit, and flexible, and fluid.

You don’t need to believe a push up or Zumba class will make you stronger and healthier, you just need to do it - with good form and regularly - and the results are obvious.

Regular practice is everything then.

A fitness regime is essential. If you want a better life, some sort of regular “choice” practice - as in choosing your attitude and choosing to be present - is necessary.

You need to give it enough time to create a new habit, for it to become stronger, and the predominant way of living and being in the world.

But the more you do it, the more your life changes and so the more you keep wanting to do it.

It becomes self-propelling and motivating.

But you need to start. And you need the commitment to follow through.

Grab a buddy and make a pact, set aside a time each day. Just close your eyes. Remind yourself to see everything as being half-full. Be as present in this moment as much as you can.

If you need any assistance in this, let me know. I know some good ways.

Take care, and have a wonderful weekend! In fact, make it a habit.

- Arjuna

Things to do to make sure your day is a happy one

Happiness is a choice. When you realise you aren’t so much in control of the situation as you are in control of your reaction to the situation, then happiness becomes a viable option. It becomes in your control.

So how can you set your day up to be a happy one?

I have drawn up a little list for you. Feel free to add your own:

1.) Prioritise said happiness Wake up every morning with the intention of making the foundation of your day the choice to be happy (or whatever the most important thing is to you: peace, contentment, love etc). Put it first on your list.

2.) Meditate regularly Meditation - properly done - is the practice of being non-judgementally aware. Through practice a state of calm, connectedness grows within you. You also get to clearly see what choices serve you, and are able to make new ones.

3.) Accept Learn to accept the things you can’t change or leave. Don’t settle for complaining or blaming. Just accept and then you can work with what you have. Complaining is not the road to happiness.

4.) Live with your glass half-full Not an invitation to live in the pub, but rather an invitation to choose to appreciate: to see the good and the positive. You can do this in any situation or with any person, you just need to decide to.

5.) Be Grateful Happiness isn’t provided by the people and the things in your life. Happiness comes from the gratitude that these people and things are there. Gratitude is the fastest path for more.

6.) Give Find a way to give to other people. Even if it is a smile or the intention to make someone’s life a little easier, do it. You cannot be self-absorbed when you are giving. And if you find yourself ‘stuck’, get going and give.

7.) Hang out with happy people Spend as much time as you can with people that make you happy. It is contagious!

8.) Live a life of purpose Every day, do those things that fulfil your purpose. If you aren’t sure what your purpose is, it is closely related to your passions.

Give them a try and see what happens…

How to be really happy

I love to ask people what the most important thing is to them. Its a question we don't get asked often, or at all.

I’ve asked people from all around the world and they all say the same thing: It’s about being happy and content and fulfilled and loved and adventurous and having a purpose and etc etc…

What is the most important thing to you?

I bet you it has nothing to do with your goals or your possessions or your bank account or your job. It’s not about the external circumstances in your life.

These things are important - and fun - but the most important thing is an internal way of feeling about and being in life.

It’s not what you do, but how you do the things that you do. It’s not what you have, but how you relate to the things that you have.

It’s an important distinction because if you really get this you will connect the dots…

…and see that this most important thing in your life isn’t caused by anything.

It then can be a choice, a way of relating to the world where you get to decide.

It cannot be given to you and it cannot be taken away from you.

How wonderful is that?

You get to choose to be happy.

So: Choose to be happy. Choose to become that thing which is most important to you.

More on this tomorrow. Stay tuned.

Do you know that person?

Why would you want to spend precious time in your day with your eyes closed? What does it do for the real world?

Well... you know that person, that one inside you?

I do. I learnt to meditate because I wanted him to be around more.

You know... that guy or girl within you who is patient, open and friendly, happy, helpful, able to deal with life easily.

The one that doesn’t worry about their bills or get uptight about doing the things that they have to do.

The one who is able to stand up for themselves and be direct but who is able help everyone win. Who no matter what just lets it go, thinks of something funny to say and gets on.

That one that doesn't throw their dummy when everyone else around them is throwing theirs.

The one that doesn't take anything seriously, yet who is really clear and creative and gets stuff done with the minimum of fuss.

The one that really appreciates the people in their life and takes the time to let them know, who sees the beauty in their world, who is grateful for what they have.

The one that rests content at night in the knowledge that they have played a small part in making the world a better place.

You know that person, right? Inside you?

I know you live a busy life, but stop for a moment. Ask yourself, what is the purpose of your life? Not as in what do you want to do in your life, but how do you want to do it? Are the things in your life as important as the quality of it? What is it that is important to you?

I ask this because, in the pursuit of making the money to make life happen, that person inside all of us gets lost. We get tired, stressed, we make other priorities. We forget what is really important to us in the busy-ness of our day to day, we don't take time to get unstressed.

This is just one of the reasons why I continue to meditate. The more regularly I practice, the more that guy comes out – and the more I become him. I see this for everyone who practices regularly. It is just a matter of stopping and going within, and the knots of busy-ness are allowed to untie around that person inside you.

What would your life be like if he or she came out more regularly? What if you were her or him all the time? Isn't it worth finding out?

Life is so precious. You have no idea how much time you have. Please, whatever you do with your life, you don't want to waste it. Make the most of it, now.

Who's the boss?

Do you feel like you are wrestling with a constantly active mind? Do you feel like you have been given to your mind, as opposed to your mind being given to you?

Your mind never rests, it is never content. It is always active - that's what it does. You find a bit of happiness and calm, and then your mind is gone, searching for the next thing. Your mind can never be content because its always on the hunt, but that's its job.

We have a problem with over-thinking because through habit we have let the mind become the boss. We've let it into the driving seat and its gotten away, going for it, predicting, guessing, checking, comparing, the whole works. Its not relaxing because the mind is constantly busy doubting and worrying. Its inefficient too. Because the mind is never present, we rarely can meet the true need of this moment. We rarely show up for life.

In all ways, for the fullest life possible we have to learn to again be the boss of the mind.

Being the boss of the mind doesn't mean closing it down or shutting it up. It means realising what the mind is, and having a different perspective, a bigger perspective.

We are awareness. We are what we notice. For the longest time all we have noticed is the same old loops of thought that are floating around inside our skulls. We're so involved in the detail we don't see anything else. We notice the content but rarely the context. We notice the fish swimming, but rarely the water. We notice the words, but rarely who is reading. The universe is a big place, a wondrous place, but we just don't notice much of it.

Being clear, calm and content does not require force. It involves relaxing, taking a step back. When you stop and become presence, even just for a moment, everything changes. By becoming aware of the bigger picture the mind becomes smaller, quieter in comparison. You become content. Not that you weren't contentment already, its just that you were distracted, listening to your mind trying to be helpful by telling you everything that was wrong.

You also become ready. Ready for anything. All possibilities. You can meet the need of this moment because you're not absorbed in the mind talk about the last moment or the next one. You can direct your considerable attention to anything you wish, not just what your mind believes is important.

If you become the boss of your mind, you are free. Free to put your attention on anything you wish. Free to follow what is most important to you, your highest desire. Free to finally show up for life, to participate fully in it. Yet most importantly, you are free to realise who you really are.

Purpose and Peace

Many people ask: "How do you be full of peace and yet live a full, rich life?", as if they are two distinct things.

They aren't two different things. Being peaceful and full of purpose actually nurture each other. You can't live a complete life without either. So many people sell themselves short, either chasing their goals at the expense of their peace, or chasing their peace at the loss of their goals.

It needn't be this way. All the great people of this world have both - they embody a seeming paradox of having an intense will and at the same time possessing a huge humility. They have direction and certainty and yet are open to more, open to learn.

Coming to know that still quiet place inside gives you a platform so that you can experience the same. Its two branches coming from the same tree: The ability to be completely calm and content and yet dedicate your attention to whatever you wish.

In other words, you can access a complete dedication to your goals, a one pointed focus on what you are called to do and not let anything stand in your way, and have an absolute ability to "let go" and "go with the flow", to be completely loving and present to this moment.

Its important that you know that this isn't an either/or option.

So many people have made it so over the years. Because of this common movement it seems that this idea has become "true". Luckily the Truth is not democratic.

The more you experience the quiet presence inside, the more you'll come to be authentic, to live life in your own way. And then the more you live your life, the more peace and the more certainty you will find in activity, in busy-ness. It will become so that you cannot live any other way.

You can have your cake and eat it too. Everything is right here, within you.

Being a hero

It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or by demons, heaven or hell.- Buddha

Buddha once said that the most heroic thing that anyone could ever do is face themselves.

If you want more from life, at some stage you will have to take stock and review. If you ever look at yourself honestly, go easy. Be clear and direct but don't judge yourself harshly if you feel you have failed in some way. What is judgement but the very thing that you are leaving?

You have done the best you could, at the time. Now you're in a different position. You see clearer and know better, so you will do better.

Looking within and fully and freely exercising your choice in your life is the most rewarding journey that any human being could ever embark on. The rewards for turning away from stress and limitation are instantaneous, and allow you to see yourself and the result of your choices with even greater clarity. Awareness is a gift.

It may be that sometimes you become aware of poor choices. Wonderful. Keep walking towards what you want. Keep moving, keep making the choices that bring real fulfilment and contentment - not just for some future moment, but now.

Your dream, your vision of your perfect life can be true. It can be true! So many people have this dream. So few are willing to make sure they experience it.

I've got it good in that I'm surrounded by people that remind me of this every time I see them. You may live with people like this or you may not, but you are surrounded by them. All it requires is for you reach out and ask for help.

Reaching out and getting what you need is so simple, but how often do you not? Do it. Do whatever it takes to keep every moment filled with your dream.

Clear, calm, content and fully alive

Where can you be completely at peace? Clear, calm, content and fully alive? Only right here, right now. Where ever you find yourself.

I always tried to control everything: my body, my desires, my emotions, my thoughts, seeking this experience, avoiding that one. Constantly judging. This is right, this is wrong, I am right, I am wrong.

I think everyone does. No wonder lasting peace and contentment eludes the world.

What I’ve found is that peace doesn’t come from control or from having anything sorted. Peace is not found in the future when I have everything the way I think it should be. Peace is here when I let go, when I allow what is, right now, in the unconditional acceptance of who I am and how the world is.

See what happens if you do it. Just for a moment let go. Allow your awareness to fill not with the details of what moves through it, but with what is beyond that. Resting, not seeking, not trying or chasing, leaving control and judgement and becoming acceptance itself.

If you truly embrace this space of absolute acceptance there is no such thing as a mistake, there is no such thing as a wrong experience. Everything that comes up becomes not a step off the path but a chance to be clearer in what is really important to you. You see since you can always let go again now; the past has no influence on your ability to fill yourself up in this moment.

It doesn’t matter what has been. Judge not. It brings you nothing you need. Concern yourself not with what has happened, or what will happen, but what is beyond happening. Peace is there.

Passion and Purpose

When you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced. Live a life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice - Anon Have you wondered what your purpose is? For what reason you are on this planet?

I got so excited when I met the Ishayas because I felt like I had found my purpose. The simple ability to be able to choose to experience that certain "something"... that spaciousness beyond my mind... that full, calm, clear "presence" within... that state of "Flow"...

...whatever you want to call it, it filled a hole in my heart that had been there for a long time. Committing my life to that choice was the only thing that made sense to me. Realizing that I could help others to the same experience just made my heart sing. I’ve always wanted to help others and here was the thing.

Have you wondered what your purpose is? For what reason you are on this planet?

Your purpose is exactly the same as your passion. Passion is the motor that gives drive to the GPS direction located in your heart. You all know what your passion is, the hardest thing is that we feel we should be doing something else. It’s that old chestnut of who we are is not good enough; what we want to do, we shouldn’t.

Everyone I’ve talked to about passion is almost always seeking permission to do the things that bring them the greatest joy. We know what we love to do, sometimes we’re just waiting for the acknowledgement that we are allowed to do that, that it’s okay to do that.

So here it is: You are officially allowed to do whatever it is that makes your heart sing. God definitely wants you to, that’s why she gave you a heart that could sing.

There’s a question that the Ishayas asked me once that never fails to align my life: “Where in my life am I compromising?” Some of you may remember that. Part of compromise is living a life that isn’t completely full. You know that in your heart of hearts. Time to have a look and see if there is something you need to be doing. Follow your passion, make a difference.

Life In Perspective

Nothing surpasses the holiness of those who have learned perfect acceptance of everything that is. In the game of life one plays the hand one is dealt to the best of one’s ability. Those who insist on playing not the hand they were given, but the one they insist they should have been dealt – these are life’s failures. We are not asked if we will play. That is not an option. Play we must. The option is how. - Maharishi Sadashiva Isham

I have a friend who found out a couple of weeks ago he has a tumour in his brain. I just saw him, and he is doing amazing. He is, in his own words, spiritually filled up.

He’s using his Ishayas' Ascension meditation practice more than ever because this news has shown him what stability it brings. He’s not freaking out over what might happen. He’s taking every moment just as it comes. He is receiving so much love, all he wants to do is give as much out as he can. He is so saturated in the goodness of life, and all due to the events of life making things very black and white for him.

Sometimes life just puts things in perspective for you. It shows you what is important and what really isn’t. It shows you what you have control over and what you don’t.

I know life gets busy. I know sometimes life is challenging. But don’t lose sight of what is truly important to you. Don't delay goodness until life looks the way you want it to. You may be waiting a long time for it to look perfect.

We don’t have any control over what happens to us, but we do have control over how we live through what happens. When it is all said and done, the how is the only thing that matters.

Stop fighting for what you can’t control, and start choosing for what you can. Fill this moment up with your presence. Choose to see the good, choose for acceptance, for gratitude, for love, for peace.

Life takes on another dimension when you let go of the "what," and fill each moment with the "how."

Simple and joyful, all the way

The truth is simple, and the living of it will make you laugh. If it’s not simple, it’s simply not the truth.

What I love about the meditation practice I practice - The Bright Path Ishayas' Ascension - is that it is the most simple thing I know, and it isn’t serious at all. The living of truth is a serious business, yet anytime I get serious, there is no truth.

Every holy woman and man I have ever met have been remarkable in the amount of joy they exude. Even when talking about the most serious of topics, the lightness of their being infuses every moment.

No one who has a full and rich experience of inner peace takes themselves seriously for a second.

It’s funny how I thought in order to be free, it involved some complicated knowledge, the gaining of which was a serious pursuit. I remember when I met my first Ishayas. I was wondering about their integrity because they seemed so simple, so innocent. “What could they teach me?” I thought. It turned out to be a lot.

Seriousness and lack of simplicity has become a really good indicator of where I’m off, where I’m complicating things.

It is very very simple just to stop, be aware and sink into this moment. How wonderful is it to know that is all peace requires? It makes any hard work and struggling to seriously attain something just a little bit funny.

How wonderful is it that life can be this simple? How wonderful that experiencing peace in this moment is this simple?

Commitment - what is important to you?

Commitment is the single greatest thing that will bring you what you want.

Anything that you have now is because you made a commitment to it – a commitment of heart and soul to dream it: “Yes, this is important to me” and body and mind to follow through in reality: “I won’t let anything distract me”.

The time we give every day to something is a great indicator of its importance to us. We say so many things are important, and so often we shrug our shoulders and say “I just don’t have enough time”.

Yet if it was truly important to you, you would find the time. My fellow Ishaya Priya put it beautifully:

“’Not having enough time’ is not a reason for something you can’t do, but only an excuse for something you don’t want to do.”

Many times it’s a matter of perspective.

When you first met an Ishaya, chances are they would have asked you a question: “If you could have one thing, anything at all, what would it be?” You would have said something like, peace, love, joy, freedom. All humanity is the same; our highest desire in life is to be free and happy.

That question is powerful because it brings what is truly important to you to light.

Now, how much time every day do you personally spend making sure your highest desire becomes a reality? You say it is the most important thing to you, but I am willing to bet money that actually it ends up way down on your priority list.

Gain some perspective on what is really important to you, and commit to that, truly. Don’t procrastinate. Ensure what is important is reflected in each and every day. You don’t want to live any other way.

Non-attachment: Take nothing seriously

Have strong opinions but keep them lightly held - Philip GoldmanLaugh at what you hold sacred, and still hold it sacred - Abraham Maslow Sacred cows make the best hamburgers – Mark Twain

You may have noticed that the times things get sticky for you are also the times you take things seriously. Seriousness is constriction, holding onto something tightly. It means you cannot be open or flexible or receptive to anything else.

Holding tight means you are guaranteed to hit up against something. Conflict and suffering becomes inevitable. You will set yourself up in opposition to others, but also nature itself.

Nature is change. There is the old story comparing the oak tree with the willow. When a strong wind blows the oak standing stiff and unmoving cracks and breaks; the willow is able to bend with the wind - its strength is in flexibility.

The answer is not to take anything seriously, even that which is most important to you. Have strong opinions but carry them lightly. Be open, receptive and flexible.

Make no demands. Have preferences, strong ones if you wish, but insist not. Hold onto nothing, set nothing in stone.

You may find when you do this the difference between you and your opinions become clear. When someone challenges an opinion tightly held, we believe they are challenging who we are. You see this happening so much in the world – taking things personally leads to so much misunderstanding and conflict.

Your opinions are not you. Your beliefs of how things should happen are not you. All beliefs are simply an idea of what is true from your point of view at this point in time.

The truth is much closer to you than any belief.

The way to constant peace is lined with laughter. Hold onto nothing - take nothing seriously.

The world owes you nothing

What a difference your attitude makes.

Some people live this life believing they deserve more. They are right - everyone continually deserves more - but they demand more, stomping their feet like a small child, unappreciative.

When you demand, ungrateful, the whole world turns its back on you.

The world does not owe you anything. On the contrary, you are absolutely blessed to be here.

Every moment that you are simply alive is nothing short of a miracle.

Realise that and you will be so filled with gratitude and awe you will never demand anything ever again.

You continually fill your attention with presence and stillness, nothing is lacking. Filled up, needing nothing, demanding for nothing, the whole world throws its treasure at you.

The stillness responds to your attitude. Don’t demand it comes to you; go to it, empty, giving everything of yourself. In that way, and only in that way, you will be forever filled.

What makes you come alive?

I don't believe people are looking for the meaning of life as much as they are looking for the experience of being alive - Joseph Campbell

Many people spend their life looking for their purpose. They want to find out why they are here. They want to wake up in the morning with a sense of contributing to something, of knowing that they are of use.

Do you know what I mean?

The answer to your life’s purpose lies in the question: What makes you come alive? What is it that you love to do?

The things that make you come alive are the very things that shape your purpose. Get clear on your passions and your gifts and you’ll find your purpose.

Quite often people don’t think that what they love to do is enough, as in “useful” enough. They think it’s too simple, not important or grand enough to make a difference. Or they want to do it more, but they doubt their abilities, or they doubt they can make a living doing it, or whatever.

But when you do what you love to do, what state do you enter?

Aware, absorbed, excited, peaceful, complete, content, joyful, satisfied... alive.

You need to do the things you love to do because it makes your life worth living. Do what you love to do more, simply for you and you may find in the doing so you change the world.

“Don't ask yourself what the world needs - ask yourself what makes you come alive, and then go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” - Harold Thurman

That point of alive presence and stillness that comes when you're immersed in what you love will show you the real key to purpose.

All doubt about what we want to do is dissolved when we fully give ourselves to it. When you’re absorbed in your own presence and awareness, when you stop worrying and start being, there is no doubt.

That is your real purpose: To come alive to such a degree that doubt no longer exists, no matter what you are involved in.

Your being alive speaks volumes, far more than words or noble deeds. People notice your alive presence, and want to really live too.

Your purpose is to be alive, truly alive.

Why do you delay what is most important to you?

Seek first the Kingdom of Heaven and all else shall be added onto you- Jesus Since death is inevitable, why not do as the sages say and see if what they say works - Nisargadatta Maharaj

In every moment there is a choice: We are either turning towards or turning away from peace.

Why do you constantly delay your peace? Do you realise that you do?

So many people postpone. First of all, there is a basic equation that we believe works: “When I have x I shall be y.” When I have my new job I can be peaceful. When I find my soul mate I shall be content. When I lose a few more pounds I will be happy.

Humanity believes there is a middle man to peace. We believe happiness lies in things. Find the right person, possession, pet etc. etc. and all will be well.

The second thing is that we say peace is the most important thing in our life, but it is the first thing out the window. It’s a priority, but how much time do you spend in your day making sure you have peace? Not relative, “I’m okay, I got through that day” kind of peace, but nothing but absolute seamless perfect peace?

Even when you have a simple, effortless meditation technique such as the Ishayas' Ascension that makes peace a direct, continuous and unconditional lived experience, you still delay.

Many don’t use it. Many don't practice like the teachers tell them to. They treat it like an aspirin, taking it off the shelf when times are tough. Or when times are tough it’s the first thing to get dropped.

I don’t want this to be an excuse to beat yourself up, but a chance to see what your priorities are. You don't have to give anything up, just realise what is the most important thing to you. When you do, keep it constantly as the first thing and the last thing in your life.

My teacher once said that for anyone to experience all the wonders of the world that the sages have talked about for millennia is “never a case of can you, but will you”.

What if everything the sages say is true? And if not now, when?

Innocence - part 2

When someone seeks, then it easily happens that his eyes see only the thing that he seeks, and he is able to find nothing, to take in nothing because he always thinks only about the thing he is seeking, because he has one goal, because he is obsessed with his goal. Seeking means: having a goal. But finding means: being free, being open, having no goal. - Hermann Hesse

Innocence is having no fixed expectations. It is being fresh, being free, being open. Innocence is the cornerstone of a full life.

Meditation shows you how to regain innocence. Meditation, just like life, gives you what you need, not necessarily what you want, and definitely not what you expect or demand.

In this regard, the path and the goal are the same thing. Innocence and meditation go hand in hand.

So when you sit to meditate, or you simply stop and rest your attention in the essence of this moment, don’t do it for a reason. Don’t do it to get anything. Don’t do it to get rid of your thoughts, to rest. Don’t even do it for peace. Just see what stillness has for you, right in this moment of time.

You’ll find meditation, and life, becomes simple. You’ll become open, receptive to whatever needs to happen. You’ll find contentment because you have let go of expectation.

Innocence means you meet life as it is, pure, without expectation, judgement, or filters.

Some confuse innocence with naivety. I say an innocent life is an authentic life. You are you, without masks or roles or old reactive patterns of behaviour. You are able to meet the need of the moment. You are untouched by change. Each interaction is fresh, new, alive.

Innocence has no agenda. There is no effort in innocence. There is no grasping there either.

Put down your expectations and demands. Rest innocently in the heart of stillness and in all moments all is well.

Awareness

The aim of life is to live, and to live means to be aware, joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware - Henry Miller

It’s all about awareness.

In awareness, in awake-ness, there is aliveness. We spend living our lives in a tiny part of the universe - largely in the space between our ears - and even there in that small tunnel of perspective we’re not really aware or awake to what we are telling ourselves, to how we construct our life.

We have taken on beliefs, judgements, customs, ways and means and they have become Truths: The Way Things Are Done and The Way I Am and The Way You Should Be. These patterns of thought and these habits of doing are not Truth, not even close.

It’s not natural that we do these things, it’s just an agreed way of seeing and being in the world - sometimes as individuals, sometimes as societies. Some of these things serve us, many do not.

Unconscious rigidity in these ways doesn’t serve. It leaves one humourless, serious, static, unyielding and unbending. When life changes - and it does because life is change - it will inevitably meet up against the combined total of our assumed truths, that being that This Should Not Be Happening To Me. People’s unaware rigid expectations means they suffer, simply because they are sleep walking through life.

Awareness gives you the flexibility to make free choice. If you can be aware of what you are telling yourself, of the patterns of how you construct your life, then you can choose differently. Life doesn’t become an inevitable reaction, you don’t keep recreating the same situations time in, time out, you don’t keep giving energy to the same useless circle of thoughts: Awareness means life becomes Life.

It takes zero effort to be aware. Awareness just is. Open, watching, receptive. Awareness isn’t about stopping thought, that’s where the effort comes in.  It just is seeing, attentive to all things, avoiding nothing. You can’t make your life aware. You can only be aware now. It matters not a doddle how awake you have been, only in this moment can you see clearly.

The beauty of awareness is opening your perception beyond the narrow tunnel of thought. There you discover much more about yourself and the world. Awareness has so little to do with thought and patterns of behaviour - awareness allows you to discover the still silent presence within. There you can discover unchanging permanent Truth. There you can live through anything with peace in your heart. There is absolute aliveness, it is the source of Life itself.

Life is but a game

In this game of life one of the critical realizations is that you, as an individual, get to define what winning is. You set the goal posts.

There is a dominant definition of success in our culture, for sure. A successful life, the theory goes, meets certain criteria and includes certain experiences. If you have this job or status or amount of money in the bank or live in that neighbourhood then you are a success.

But what about how much you enjoy the game? What about how fulfilled you feel?

The beauty of the game of life is that you can agree or disagree with any idea of success. What winning is for you personally is totally and only up to you. How can you play if you don’t like what the goal of the game is? Exactly. So, you decide.

Anthony de Mello once wrote something I think is just superb. He said:

Nothing surpasses the holiness of those who have learned perfect acceptance of everything that is.  In the game of life one plays the hand one is dealt to the best of one’s ability.  Those who insist on playing not the hand they were given, but the one they insist they should have been dealt – these are life’s failures.  We are not asked if we will play.  That is not an option.  Play we must.  The option is how.

How you play needs to be everything to success.

Sometimes you just don’t have control over the external ‘bits’ of life: where you find yourself or what is happening. Just like a rollercoaster there will be ups and downs. If the basis of your personal definition of winning is in the internal aspect - how at peace or content or happy you are - the possibility of success in the game of life will be available to you in each and every moment.

You are in charge of how at peace you are with what is. How you respond to the ups and downs of life is up to you. You can enjoy it, or not, but this enjoyment isn’t based on anything but your response. Treat life just as if it was a game where winning isn’t so much about what you have but what you are.

So play, and play well, but keep your eye on your big picture. What’s the most important thing to you? Is it having something or being happy? Respond accordingly.

Don’t be afraid, you can’t get it wrong. You define the game, and can change that definition at any time. The only thing you could do ‘wrong’ is hold yourself back from fully playing your game. There aren't any real winners or losers, only those who had an amazing ride, finding complete enjoyment, or those that didn’t.

It’s totally up to you. Play, be full on, have fun.

Innocence - How a fresh attitude changes everything

We do not see things as they are; we see them as we are. We do not hear things as they are; we hear them as we are - The Talmud

You see what you expect to see. The world is created by your expectations. If you wish to engage with the world fully, as it is, you need to drop these filters to reality.

Life is so much easier without expectations.

The Bright Path Ishayas refer to this as being innocent. I like that.

Innocence = having no expectations = no preconceived ideas = no prejudice

There is no better way of instantly experiencing more peace and joy. Having no preconceived ideas about any person or situation means that you can experience things exactly as they are. Instant freedom.

We only experience suffering in life when our experience of it does not meet our expectations. The stronger our expectation the greater the trouble for us. Recognise this?

Innocence has a sense of play about it too. If you're really being innocent and fresh, you cannot possibly be taking anything seriously. Taking things seriously is always the end of enjoyment. Also - If there is such a thing as an omnipresent cosmic intelligence taking an interest in my life, I've found it goes out of its way to poke me when I am being serious. How about you?

Innocence does not mean naivety. It means being open to life changing in unexpected ways. It means having the flexibility to accept this change, thus being in a position to cope, to react creatively, to enjoy the ride. It is an easy, fun, peaceful way to live.

Innocence and Meditation:

We all want something from the practice of meditation. However, what I've found is that meditation will give you what you need and not necessarily what you want. It definitely doesn't give you what you expect.

You are not in control of the experience when you close your eyes. A great deal of healing is taking place. Your meditations will be so much easier and fulfilling if you let go of control and allow whatever happens happen.

Take an attitude of innocence with what is happening. It just doesn't help to fight or insist on a certain experience, so you might as well sit back and relax. If you are using an effective meditation technique it will guide you to the best possible experience. It will give you what you need.

You be innocent and let go of any idea of what should be happening and all your meditations will be easy and restful and enjoyable. Anything else and they get harder and less fun. If you're just beginning, judge progress not just by what happens during your practice time but also in your wider life.

You may find that even though you might have a lot of thoughts when you close your eyes, when you open them you are at rest, you don't react so much, you are more calm and centred.

Give it a try.